I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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