would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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