in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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