Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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