I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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