he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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