I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
