I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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