drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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