What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
if i died would you start the facebook group?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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