he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
