If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize