that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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