I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
