We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
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