update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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