Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize