so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
