Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
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