I want to have your abortion
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
