So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
