your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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