Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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