He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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