Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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