i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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