I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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