it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
