I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
