Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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