I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
