So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
