Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize