and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
