Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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