: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Randomize
