; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
