in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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