Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
