No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
