that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
