If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
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