What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
only you would photoshop your dick
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Randomize