Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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