I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize