she takes plan B like it's going out of style
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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