I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
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