i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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