someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
