i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
