Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
