i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
